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RECORD PLAYER / / Why Floribama Shore is the Trash Fire you Didn't know you Needed

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One of my favorite things ever is a day at home doing projects, organizing and cleaning with trash tv blaring in the background. During one of these productive days I binged on MTV's Floribama Shore and let me tell you - it did not disappoint. 

Making fun of NJ is so overdone at this point (honestly we are glad for the reprieve - I got to roll my eyes at Joey Fatone in an elevator for making a NJ joke and it was an incredible moment) but I'd be lying if I said i didn't miss the shitshow that was Jersey Shore. I'm so siked to tell you that this show has filled that trashtastic void so perfectly. 

 Possibly my favorite character - Kortni has a natural stripper name, likes to pee everywhere and has to be held back by bouncers on multiple occasions. Be my BFF plz. 

Possibly my favorite character - Kortni has a natural stripper name, likes to pee everywhere and has to be held back by bouncers on multiple occasions. Be my BFF plz. 

Please observe this clip of pure class as they fight native Floridians and roll around in the street. I watched this at least 11 times because it is entertainment at its absolute peak. #DOLLARDRAFTBEERPEOPLE. Also more proof that Kortni is da real VIP.

Then there is this absolutely perfect clip of them dining in a fancy strip mall chain restaurant. PURE TV GOLD. #BOLOGNASE people! YAS!

Thank god there is a second season coming this summer because I don't think I could survive without seeing Aimee throw a bottle of mayo at someones face again or mispronounce perfectly normal words like corsage. 

Overall the dudes were pretty basic and douchey - I AM pretty interested in seeing Nilsa's faux feminist journey, maybe she will realize that 10 months without a dude after a divorce at 23 is GOOD FOR U BB. LUV U THO. UR LIKE REALLY PRETTY. JOSH WAS LAME.  WHO DID UR BOOBS CUZ THEY ARE PERF.

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No but really - this is a reality show thats actually worth the watch - I LOLed and I actually felt kind of heartfelt for these people. Ready for Season 2!


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Thanks to our contributor Angela for this post!

Angela is the other half of HOC. When she's not hovering over the Instagram or managing the website, she enjoys manicures, taking pictures of clouds & getting white girl wasted while watching Bill Murray movies. She is currently doing important Mobwife related research at the Jersey Shore.

follow her journey here @angelabasolis